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Several years ago, I lost my mother suddenly to a cancerous brain tumor. This was the beginning of the roller coaster ride of alcohol and drug dependency. I tried to numb the pain and grief with these substances while attempting to maintain a functional lifestyle. Being raised in a Christian family, I was active in the church and community. After my mother's death, I became a master at leading a double lifestyle. While working in the educational system, I appeared to be happy and in control to all whom knew me. On the inside, however, I resembled a mirror that was slowly breaking chip by chip, until I was finally shattered. Eventually, I gave up caring about what happened to me because my mother, my confidante, my friend whom I celebrated my birthday every year was gone. One day my father told me about a dream he had. In this dream my mother was holding my hand and I was crying. She then placed my hand in my father's hand and told him I needed help. Now, I see that dream as Jesus reaching out His bloodstained hand to give me a second chance at life. The next step was getting help. I left my job as a college recruiter to come to Teen Challenge for one year. I am now set free from the double lifestyle I was leading. Today, I can thank God for the doors He has shut in my life and for the door that He opened to Teen Challenge. Statistics indicate that four out of twelve people sitting on a church pew have a life-controlling problem, and I was one of those four people. I no longer have to hide anything from God because He has become my refuge and my help in time of trouble. Jesus released me from the bondage of depression and addiction. Daily, He shows me how precious I am to Him and how free I am in Him. I am now walking by faith and not by sight. The focus is no longer on my pain and myself, I have given it all to God. My attention is now on Jesus Christ and how He can be glorified in my life. I plan to use my experiences as an educator to lead other hurting women to Christ. Posted in my desk area is the scripture verse Revelations 12:11. Daily, I read it like it was written just for me--Michele "you overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, the word of your testimony, and you loved not your life unto death." I recommit my life to the Lord everyday as an offering for use in the kingdom of God. I pray that the word of my testimony will help others be delivered from bondage by the saving grace of Jesus Christ. He has turned my mourning into dancing! |
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